I finally realized that Karma does in fact, take a number! Actually in my life it does because death has to come over and kill off a million people and then make me suffer and cry in class. Hooray Karma!
You're special.
And Spastically annoying and I wish you would just die already, seriously just keal over and DIE.
I really want ice cream, and omg blogging? I don't care anymore, I'm just going to write my thoughts and you guys can go on Youtube and view my videos instead! Yay. I actually get into detail and you should be glad I'm bringing a face to the fantastical writer you named Margarita Sunshine.
So about the whole Karma takes a number, it really doesn't it's more like if I keep wishing Karma on other people I'm going to just get more Karma, so if I wish them the best, they'll get Karma. Ha, ha, hahahahahahaha! HAH! No but really I just need to be nice to them and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah... blah (blah blah blah!) blah. My OCD is taking over sorry, I appologize in advance.
Which reminds me, the guy that I wanted to feel pain, probably never will, actually he will, he just won't know why until I tell which I'll never do! Muahaha! That's not fair, but it's funny either way.
So I gotta go. You'll be able to see my on the road again post soon!
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
It Will Probably Happen That Way.
I lied to my mom about this post, I told her it was an email to my friend, but it not and I'll be getting my Karma whlie no one else does. Just once, I would like to witness someone else's Karma, have her pain be public, out there for others to laugh at. Please, just this once, I would like to see someone else get it for a change.
Someone who wronged me severely, someone who deserves it so much that my heart is pacing at my hatred for them. Someone whom I loved once.
Wishing revenge on an old loved one, I sound like a jealous ex.
Except I'm not jealous.
And he's not my ex.
I'm just bitter.
And I want him to feel the same pain I felt.
Badly.
But I guess my Karma will come this way if I wish that upon them, so I suppose I'll leave it at that.
He'll get it eventually.
Someone who wronged me severely, someone who deserves it so much that my heart is pacing at my hatred for them. Someone whom I loved once.
Wishing revenge on an old loved one, I sound like a jealous ex.
Except I'm not jealous.
And he's not my ex.
I'm just bitter.
And I want him to feel the same pain I felt.
Badly.
But I guess my Karma will come this way if I wish that upon them, so I suppose I'll leave it at that.
He'll get it eventually.
I Have A Secret
I have a secret, well, it's not a secret it's the question everyone wants to know but can never answer because they are too divulged in this world.
Love. Yes. I have found the definition to love... Not what the dictionary claims it to be, but the true meaning of love and what it is.
Love is feeling secure and unsecure at the same time about someone, feeling as if though you do anything with them or ruin a chance and you're afraid that you'll lose them forever. It's a passion, love is a passion, most definately, I can commend to that.
But the love of something is different, loving someone and falling in love can be easily confused, I've done this before also. But you'll know the difference, trust me on this one.
People say that you deny it, it is true, you deny it because you feel you do not know what love is and yet there are some people who claim to be in love with someone in a very short amount of time.
But love is a Passion, feeling so strongly about someone that you have to have them every moment of the day, and when they get home or when you hear them say your name, it's a new experience repeated all over again. Just as great as the first time they ever said it.
Love is feeling safe and yet scare with someone at the same time. When their not around you're convinced that they are cheating on you or don't love you anymore, it's just as exciting knowing that they only come home to you.
Love, it's complicated yet simple.
Love. Yes. I have found the definition to love... Not what the dictionary claims it to be, but the true meaning of love and what it is.
Love is feeling secure and unsecure at the same time about someone, feeling as if though you do anything with them or ruin a chance and you're afraid that you'll lose them forever. It's a passion, love is a passion, most definately, I can commend to that.
But the love of something is different, loving someone and falling in love can be easily confused, I've done this before also. But you'll know the difference, trust me on this one.
People say that you deny it, it is true, you deny it because you feel you do not know what love is and yet there are some people who claim to be in love with someone in a very short amount of time.
But love is a Passion, feeling so strongly about someone that you have to have them every moment of the day, and when they get home or when you hear them say your name, it's a new experience repeated all over again. Just as great as the first time they ever said it.
Love is feeling safe and yet scare with someone at the same time. When their not around you're convinced that they are cheating on you or don't love you anymore, it's just as exciting knowing that they only come home to you.
Love, it's complicated yet simple.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
I wrote this is School
There's probably a reason I'm writing to you, probably another reason why I have this stupid computer in my lap.
Why I have people complaining about conditions they have to live with.
Life, it's retarded and guarnteed to bite you in the ass at least once. Karma, I've preached this so many times before, it's the part of life that really likes to bite you in the ass when you deserve it the most. People don't realize why bad things happen to them, are they stupid? Did they not remember the poor people they said snide remarks about? Did they not just beat up a pregnant teenager? I mean really, and they complain because they got grounded. If not having enough sense to realize that you did something wrong then Karma will bite you even harder in the ass. And you'll probably end up in Jail.
Because that's what Karma does, be one, big, annoying asshole. Karma is supposed to teach you a lesson in life, it's supposed to make you feel bad. It's not supposed to make you want to kill each other even more because you getting into a car crash is somehow linked to the pregnant teenager in the hospital. Yes, that's definately it. The world just seems to get worse and worse, and I'm kind of happy that stagitory rape was invented, it should teach some people, that they are too young to be dating that person. It's true, yet annoying.
At the same time, your boyfriend cheats on you. Wow that sucks doesn't it? Absolutely and yet you wonder why, you lost your virginity at age 16 not even maybe you're twelve and you wonder why you get pregnant. If people didn't get what they deserve the world would be even worse then it is now!
If you don't like it, live with it because that's life and the fact of it is that Karma doesn't take numbers. Karma doesn't accept notes of appologies, Karma gets you whether you like it or not. So got ahead and suck the poison before Karma bites you in your ass. Right before you grow a sense of humanity, think about what you've done and stop being a complainy, whinny, two-faced bitch, because it's just annoying.
And no one gets rewarded like that.
Why I have people complaining about conditions they have to live with.
Life, it's retarded and guarnteed to bite you in the ass at least once. Karma, I've preached this so many times before, it's the part of life that really likes to bite you in the ass when you deserve it the most. People don't realize why bad things happen to them, are they stupid? Did they not remember the poor people they said snide remarks about? Did they not just beat up a pregnant teenager? I mean really, and they complain because they got grounded. If not having enough sense to realize that you did something wrong then Karma will bite you even harder in the ass. And you'll probably end up in Jail.
Because that's what Karma does, be one, big, annoying asshole. Karma is supposed to teach you a lesson in life, it's supposed to make you feel bad. It's not supposed to make you want to kill each other even more because you getting into a car crash is somehow linked to the pregnant teenager in the hospital. Yes, that's definately it. The world just seems to get worse and worse, and I'm kind of happy that stagitory rape was invented, it should teach some people, that they are too young to be dating that person. It's true, yet annoying.
At the same time, your boyfriend cheats on you. Wow that sucks doesn't it? Absolutely and yet you wonder why, you lost your virginity at age 16 not even maybe you're twelve and you wonder why you get pregnant. If people didn't get what they deserve the world would be even worse then it is now!
If you don't like it, live with it because that's life and the fact of it is that Karma doesn't take numbers. Karma doesn't accept notes of appologies, Karma gets you whether you like it or not. So got ahead and suck the poison before Karma bites you in your ass. Right before you grow a sense of humanity, think about what you've done and stop being a complainy, whinny, two-faced bitch, because it's just annoying.
And no one gets rewarded like that.
It's not real.
I knew from the moment I laid eyes on him. It wasn't real, and I knew it, I knew it from the bottom of my heart, it was not real. I still demanded, I still urged, I still thought... that it was going to happen. That the sword in the stone was going to be taken out by someone else.
It wasn't fair, it never was, it always slapped me in the face. It was like the change was taking me away from everything by force, I never accepted things easily, I never accepted life, I never accepted the fact that I was going to die and live forever. I never wanted it to happen, I just ignored it, and until I finally realize that I can't chose my final fate.
All this time, I was waiting for their Karma to hit them, all this time, I was waiting for them to get what they deserve. But it never happened. They always got the guy, the life, and the friends everything I always wanted, but never got. And my only comfort was the fact that Karma was going to happen to them, but it never did. They never got what they deserved. They never once regretted what they did, their tears mourn for the things that aren't even worth crying over.
I was weak, I was fragile, I was broken and no one was to fix me. I couldn't make my own Karma, could I? That would only mean, I would get the backlash and they wouldn't.
Why? Why didn't they get what they knew they deserved, why couldn't they... they just have something terrible happen to them. Why couldn't their Aunt be bi-polar, why couldn't their father kill someone with their car, why couldn't their uncle died leaving his only daughter with his crazed ex-wife, why couldn't they be depressed, why couldn't they feel what I feel, why couldn't they died inside like I did, why couldn't they commit suicide, why couldn't they just DIE, why couldn't their best friend move away, why couldn't their boyfriend use them and then leave them? Why not? Make their friend suffer and FINALLY get their fucking Karma.
Could anyone tell me that? WHY THE FUCK NOT? Is it fate? Does God not think I'm worthy of having peace within me? Why do they think they can get away with anything. They all have their hardships, but could your life change within a spand of three days? No, not that quickly.
It didn't happen to her, it didn't happen to him, it didn't happen to anyone who scorn me and so many others! They didn't get what they deserve! WHY NOT? Was it just because? What could possibly happen next? Huh?! What else does life have to throw at me? What else could you possibly do? Who's next? If one more person dies, I'm gone, living in South Carolina with Dr. Pepper and AbFab.
But no, God doesn't want that, I'm supposed to have a future right? I'm supposed to die soon, right? I'm not supposed to be able to drive, huh!? Right? Am I right? It's supposed to be all over before that, before someone actually loves me and HOLDS me.
But that's too much right? Too much to ask. Too much to ask God, I see how it goes. Everyone else gets what they want, but I, me, myself, does not get anything. The short end of the stick. Eventually everyone finds love, but me? No, I will never be able to fall in love, ever.
And it's all because of Karma.
It wasn't fair, it never was, it always slapped me in the face. It was like the change was taking me away from everything by force, I never accepted things easily, I never accepted life, I never accepted the fact that I was going to die and live forever. I never wanted it to happen, I just ignored it, and until I finally realize that I can't chose my final fate.
All this time, I was waiting for their Karma to hit them, all this time, I was waiting for them to get what they deserve. But it never happened. They always got the guy, the life, and the friends everything I always wanted, but never got. And my only comfort was the fact that Karma was going to happen to them, but it never did. They never got what they deserved. They never once regretted what they did, their tears mourn for the things that aren't even worth crying over.
I was weak, I was fragile, I was broken and no one was to fix me. I couldn't make my own Karma, could I? That would only mean, I would get the backlash and they wouldn't.
Why? Why didn't they get what they knew they deserved, why couldn't they... they just have something terrible happen to them. Why couldn't their Aunt be bi-polar, why couldn't their father kill someone with their car, why couldn't their uncle died leaving his only daughter with his crazed ex-wife, why couldn't they be depressed, why couldn't they feel what I feel, why couldn't they died inside like I did, why couldn't they commit suicide, why couldn't they just DIE, why couldn't their best friend move away, why couldn't their boyfriend use them and then leave them? Why not? Make their friend suffer and FINALLY get their fucking Karma.
Could anyone tell me that? WHY THE FUCK NOT? Is it fate? Does God not think I'm worthy of having peace within me? Why do they think they can get away with anything. They all have their hardships, but could your life change within a spand of three days? No, not that quickly.
It didn't happen to her, it didn't happen to him, it didn't happen to anyone who scorn me and so many others! They didn't get what they deserve! WHY NOT? Was it just because? What could possibly happen next? Huh?! What else does life have to throw at me? What else could you possibly do? Who's next? If one more person dies, I'm gone, living in South Carolina with Dr. Pepper and AbFab.
But no, God doesn't want that, I'm supposed to have a future right? I'm supposed to die soon, right? I'm not supposed to be able to drive, huh!? Right? Am I right? It's supposed to be all over before that, before someone actually loves me and HOLDS me.
But that's too much right? Too much to ask. Too much to ask God, I see how it goes. Everyone else gets what they want, but I, me, myself, does not get anything. The short end of the stick. Eventually everyone finds love, but me? No, I will never be able to fall in love, ever.
And it's all because of Karma.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
What I wouldn't call serious.
Uhmm... well I'm supposed to be writing my book report...
hahaha book report, sounds like something I should be doing in fifth grade...
hahaha... fifth grade...
Anyways, I'm using this as a procrasnation thingy.
And now I'm actually gonna go write it, it's about the The Jungle Upton Sinclair apparently wrote it and my friend is reading it too, so it shouldn't be so hard, except for the fact that the book report is due tomorrow...
Hahaha, I'm the Queen of doing things the very last minute.
Okay I relaly gotta go...
hahaha book report, sounds like something I should be doing in fifth grade...
hahaha... fifth grade...
Anyways, I'm using this as a procrasnation thingy.
And now I'm actually gonna go write it, it's about the The Jungle Upton Sinclair apparently wrote it and my friend is reading it too, so it shouldn't be so hard, except for the fact that the book report is due tomorrow...
Hahaha, I'm the Queen of doing things the very last minute.
Okay I relaly gotta go...
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
April Fools Joke
Please tell me, you've got to be joking, you've got to be kidding me, please tell me this is another one of your April Fools Joke.
It's not, and I'm confident if something happens to one more person close to me, I'm finished, I'm done, I'm leaving this town forever. I can't stand it anymore, I'm due for a good thing, I know I am. This is just another sign that something good is going to happen. Please tell me, is it true? Could it be Cancer?
The C word never hit me as hard as it did now, I asked myself who's next, now I wish I didn't. I wish I didn't ask myself those questions because I think I know who's next. No, I can't say that, it can't be, he can't be doomed.
That's not fair, take me instead, at least he'll have more time to be saved, in my heart I know I'm saved; at least somewhere in there I know that. They need more time, I'm there for a reason and my reason is to help people, my purpose is done so take me instead.
Ah, I don't want to leave some, but if someone gets a chance to live and be saved, I guess that's fair; it needs to be done, Lord please just take me instead.
It's not right, he can't just leave, though I'm not in love with him, someone else is. And that's not fair, I know the feeling, of not knowing whether or not you'll see them tomorrow. Whether or not you'll be planning their funeral tomorrow or speaking to them tomorrow.
Please, just tell me, this is another one of your April Fools Jokes. I can't think of anything more logical then that, the purpose for that is truly unfair, so they know they can spend more time with their family.
Fairness, it is not.
Life, only some can truly live.
Love, no one knows what it is and yet most claim to have it.
Truth, facing it.
Beauty, Oh God, not in their casket.
Death, stop, please, just not now.
Purity, keeping it would have helped.
Goodness, only young, do they die.
Not true, the good can't die young, they deserve to live a long life, to fall inlove.
Please, it has to be another joke, it's gotta be, it HAS to be. I just can't stand this life anymore. It's not fair, everyone around me, dropping like flies. Stop dying, just for one day.
Please, it must be another April Fools Joke.
It's not, and I'm confident if something happens to one more person close to me, I'm finished, I'm done, I'm leaving this town forever. I can't stand it anymore, I'm due for a good thing, I know I am. This is just another sign that something good is going to happen. Please tell me, is it true? Could it be Cancer?
The C word never hit me as hard as it did now, I asked myself who's next, now I wish I didn't. I wish I didn't ask myself those questions because I think I know who's next. No, I can't say that, it can't be, he can't be doomed.
That's not fair, take me instead, at least he'll have more time to be saved, in my heart I know I'm saved; at least somewhere in there I know that. They need more time, I'm there for a reason and my reason is to help people, my purpose is done so take me instead.
Ah, I don't want to leave some, but if someone gets a chance to live and be saved, I guess that's fair; it needs to be done, Lord please just take me instead.
It's not right, he can't just leave, though I'm not in love with him, someone else is. And that's not fair, I know the feeling, of not knowing whether or not you'll see them tomorrow. Whether or not you'll be planning their funeral tomorrow or speaking to them tomorrow.
Please, just tell me, this is another one of your April Fools Jokes. I can't think of anything more logical then that, the purpose for that is truly unfair, so they know they can spend more time with their family.
Fairness, it is not.
Life, only some can truly live.
Love, no one knows what it is and yet most claim to have it.
Truth, facing it.
Beauty, Oh God, not in their casket.
Death, stop, please, just not now.
Purity, keeping it would have helped.
Goodness, only young, do they die.
Not true, the good can't die young, they deserve to live a long life, to fall inlove.
Please, it has to be another joke, it's gotta be, it HAS to be. I just can't stand this life anymore. It's not fair, everyone around me, dropping like flies. Stop dying, just for one day.
Please, it must be another April Fools Joke.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Unrequited Love
It sucks don't it?
Love, I've talked about it so many times, but I never cried over it, ever. I told myself I wasn't going to be one of those girls who would cry over an ex-boyfriend. And I wasn't, but now, I don't know, seeing my situation replayed seems to have unmasked what I felt. Grief and pain and I cried. I'm still crying, shockingly enough, the tears, I don't even try to hide because I know that nothing will happen if I show them. I've even felt pain in my heart recently, it was strange, but I disregarded it, I didn't even remember why I felt the pain, I just knew when and where.
Regret and living like this just isn't going to help anyone.
It never helped me, sulking, I made fun of those would sulked about their boyfriend, I mean there are worse things in the world and that's what I've come to face. I've also come to realize my way of life, everyone has one, you just have to find it and mine was: If it was meant to be...
Of course it would depend on the situation like if it was meant to be... then I would have had it longer then six months. Like my phone, I've had it for a year, can't keep things for longer then a few weeks so I know it's meant to be. Stuff like that... But then there comes another one, if my boyfriend or best friend was meant to be. If someone is there for more then three years, then it's meant to be. I tell my friends constantly I'm only here until they don't need me anymore.
And then I think of Nanny McPhee... no I'm much better then a fictional children's book.
Definately better.
Love, I've talked about it so many times, but I never cried over it, ever. I told myself I wasn't going to be one of those girls who would cry over an ex-boyfriend. And I wasn't, but now, I don't know, seeing my situation replayed seems to have unmasked what I felt. Grief and pain and I cried. I'm still crying, shockingly enough, the tears, I don't even try to hide because I know that nothing will happen if I show them. I've even felt pain in my heart recently, it was strange, but I disregarded it, I didn't even remember why I felt the pain, I just knew when and where.
Regret and living like this just isn't going to help anyone.
It never helped me, sulking, I made fun of those would sulked about their boyfriend, I mean there are worse things in the world and that's what I've come to face. I've also come to realize my way of life, everyone has one, you just have to find it and mine was: If it was meant to be...
Of course it would depend on the situation like if it was meant to be... then I would have had it longer then six months. Like my phone, I've had it for a year, can't keep things for longer then a few weeks so I know it's meant to be. Stuff like that... But then there comes another one, if my boyfriend or best friend was meant to be. If someone is there for more then three years, then it's meant to be. I tell my friends constantly I'm only here until they don't need me anymore.
And then I think of Nanny McPhee... no I'm much better then a fictional children's book.
Definately better.
Giving you a face.
I decided to give you guys something to look at instead.
I'm getting more and more lazy by the second so this helps both of us.
But it didn't work.
Bitch...
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
When the network is down I...
... Uhmm... post?
Yeah, I'm gay, anyways, since I'm the Queen of all people who put stuff off. But I have ten minutes left in this class but I will be able to post again in history... NOT... I lie, actually sometimes I lie so much that I believe the lie I know that's total and complete bull.
So I rededicated my life to Christ... uhmmm awkward much? Yeah awkward situations always happen around me, mainly because I love them so much that I cause them myself.
It's also funny to trick people into thinking you got something or had something last ^.^' Looong story, and I still get flasbacks... today...
Anyways, I really gotta go before my spanish teacher who likes to teach us english notices that the network is down...
I'm not a bad example... infact, I think I'm a pretty good one!
Peace (ho).
Yeah, I'm gay, anyways, since I'm the Queen of all people who put stuff off. But I have ten minutes left in this class but I will be able to post again in history... NOT... I lie, actually sometimes I lie so much that I believe the lie I know that's total and complete bull.
So I rededicated my life to Christ... uhmmm awkward much? Yeah awkward situations always happen around me, mainly because I love them so much that I cause them myself.
It's also funny to trick people into thinking you got something or had something last ^.^' Looong story, and I still get flasbacks... today...
Anyways, I really gotta go before my spanish teacher who likes to teach us english notices that the network is down...
I'm not a bad example... infact, I think I'm a pretty good one!
Peace (ho).
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Hmm...
I have a paper to write and as I looked around my room for my backpack I suddenly discovered that the stupid part of my brain decided to leave it at school (thinking I had nothing to do.). But that's besides the point because I actually remembered, to look at my email.
And looky here! I actually posted something and someone actually questioned me on it. (October 27, 2007) And no, I didn't know that, the person who emailed me, left a comment. ^.^'
Alot of commas today... and yes, The Beatles will forever stay unless you wanna hack it off, but I don't know anyone that desperate - DON'T GET ANY IDEAS! - you know who you are...
Well apon my amazing discovery (I thought only Chuck Norris could only do that...), that's number one, I decided to post about it twenty minutes after I send it... hehe.
I am not really in the mood to use puncations on the 't's today, so I am typing everything out today. DEAL WITH IT. (ith...) After I'm done remembering the good old days and maybe thinking about MUM.
Loooong story meant for no one else, I'm rambling (HAH! I used it!) with the never ending sentence. Microsoft would sue me if they found out I didn't use the spell check. I don't care today, I just wanna type the day away... not really... I just am bored...
Gotta get those 100 posts in... because I'm a homosexual bitch (LIES).
I'm straight... very straight... so in October, I mentioned said Azerkail, they seemed kind of cryptic (yes I know you can read this) of telling me whether or not he was Azerkail... I don't know anyone who would actually read the seventh (was it ten or eight?) search on google (though it does give me an ego trip...) now I'm gonna search myself...
Heh... sorry if I like to have an ego like my history teacher... (he happens to think he looks sexy) 'There I am, sexy as I am now.' - My history teacher... that was an awkward day.
Oh my god Margarita Sunshine is a song (WTF HE WAS RIGHT!) anyways... let's see what else comes up... At least the first one is the blog... Hah... it tells the point of MarSun.... hahhh...
I'm so not high. Okay I'm done...
And looky here! I actually posted something and someone actually questioned me on it. (October 27, 2007) And no, I didn't know that, the person who emailed me, left a comment. ^.^'
Alot of commas today... and yes, The Beatles will forever stay unless you wanna hack it off, but I don't know anyone that desperate - DON'T GET ANY IDEAS! - you know who you are...
Well apon my amazing discovery (I thought only Chuck Norris could only do that...), that's number one, I decided to post about it twenty minutes after I send it... hehe.
I am not really in the mood to use puncations on the 't's today, so I am typing everything out today. DEAL WITH IT. (ith...) After I'm done remembering the good old days and maybe thinking about MUM.
Loooong story meant for no one else, I'm rambling (HAH! I used it!) with the never ending sentence. Microsoft would sue me if they found out I didn't use the spell check. I don't care today, I just wanna type the day away... not really... I just am bored...
Gotta get those 100 posts in... because I'm a homosexual bitch (LIES).
I'm straight... very straight... so in October, I mentioned said Azerkail, they seemed kind of cryptic (yes I know you can read this) of telling me whether or not he was Azerkail... I don't know anyone who would actually read the seventh (was it ten or eight?) search on google (though it does give me an ego trip...) now I'm gonna search myself...
Heh... sorry if I like to have an ego like my history teacher... (he happens to think he looks sexy) 'There I am, sexy as I am now.' - My history teacher... that was an awkward day.
Oh my god Margarita Sunshine is a song (WTF HE WAS RIGHT!) anyways... let's see what else comes up... At least the first one is the blog... Hah... it tells the point of MarSun.... hahhh...
I'm so not high. Okay I'm done...
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
The... New Slang?
Messing around in History.. Again... thank Jesusss...Allah? I don't know whoever happens to be on duty up there. Maybe it's that Goddess Mark's always talking about... whatever. Seriously where the hell is my history teacher?
Whatever, not like I'm caring or actually doing work... sooo... what happened today? Uhmm... Dora the Explorer? Yeah weirdest children's show ever, is it an exercise video or something? How many people does it take to spell the word exercise? Apparently two and microsoft work check?
Uhmm... goofing off... not really basically posting something random until mister Blass comes back. How does one spell 'Mrs.'? Like Missus? Or Misses? I think it's the first one but it should be the second one... hmm... whatever... I said that like five times already.
If someone goes back and counts how many whatevers I did actually type I would love and hate them forever, because I knew I was wrong... And PS it's not really 8:13 AM... haha if it was I wouldn't be typing, I'd be sleeping in my parents' kingsized bed with my little sister sleeping on the air matress.
bahhh humbug... WAIT wrong season... gotta go.
PEACES?
Whatever, not like I'm caring or actually doing work... sooo... what happened today? Uhmm... Dora the Explorer? Yeah weirdest children's show ever, is it an exercise video or something? How many people does it take to spell the word exercise? Apparently two and microsoft work check?
Uhmm... goofing off... not really basically posting something random until mister Blass comes back. How does one spell 'Mrs.'? Like Missus? Or Misses? I think it's the first one but it should be the second one... hmm... whatever... I said that like five times already.
If someone goes back and counts how many whatevers I did actually type I would love and hate them forever, because I knew I was wrong... And PS it's not really 8:13 AM... haha if it was I wouldn't be typing, I'd be sleeping in my parents' kingsized bed with my little sister sleeping on the air matress.
bahhh humbug... WAIT wrong season... gotta go.
PEACES?
Monday, March 3, 2008
Hey Guess What?
I just made a new blog which supports organizations that help better the world like TWLOHA, ALC, and other organizations created to help those who need it.
Le Link:
http://soulmatesoflove.blogspot.com/
Go there check out the one site and read the TWLOHA facts.
Le Link:
http://soulmatesoflove.blogspot.com/
Go there check out the one site and read the TWLOHA facts.
Google Brainwashes you.
Today's news consisted of the media replaying Barrack's 'shocking' confession. And of course, the oscars... Aahhh... I must comment on the celebrities commenting about... well nothing really... just commenting.
All they really do is lie, and then they get rewarded for it? Wow, I wish I got a dollar for everytime I lied then I would have a total of 25 dollars... Okay enough sarcasm.
Today I felt strangely compelled to go to google when I really didn't need to actually google was the website I typed subconsciously and when I looked at the webpage I found myself looking at the google webpage and I did not remember it... Hmm... more conspiracies like global warming or... really bad health care.
Somewhere way down south and no I'm not talking about my potential boyfriend this time, protesters decided it'd be cool to fight the power and throw acid at people on a big boat. I'm just saying this probably wasn't the best decision on their part, but in the end they hurt four people. They wanted the boat to smell bad, surprisingly enough, boats already smell horrible so... yeah... not the smartest... people around... Apparently they thought it would be effective to throw acid at people instead of being noble and peaceful like Gandhi or Muhammad Ali... or Bill Clinton.
Apparently a girl decided to burn down her house and then kill her parents to destroy the evidence... I'm sorry but I think she left too little evidence. The reason why she decided to go OJ on her parents was because she thought they wanted her to break up with her boyfriend. Yeah... maybe they had good reason to if she decided to kill them for that, I'm just saying... it's a little crazy like that.
So that's all I care about today or even know actually... This is Margarita Sunshine and that's nice to know.
All they really do is lie, and then they get rewarded for it? Wow, I wish I got a dollar for everytime I lied then I would have a total of 25 dollars... Okay enough sarcasm.
Today I felt strangely compelled to go to google when I really didn't need to actually google was the website I typed subconsciously and when I looked at the webpage I found myself looking at the google webpage and I did not remember it... Hmm... more conspiracies like global warming or... really bad health care.
Somewhere way down south and no I'm not talking about my potential boyfriend this time, protesters decided it'd be cool to fight the power and throw acid at people on a big boat. I'm just saying this probably wasn't the best decision on their part, but in the end they hurt four people. They wanted the boat to smell bad, surprisingly enough, boats already smell horrible so... yeah... not the smartest... people around... Apparently they thought it would be effective to throw acid at people instead of being noble and peaceful like Gandhi or Muhammad Ali... or Bill Clinton.
Apparently a girl decided to burn down her house and then kill her parents to destroy the evidence... I'm sorry but I think she left too little evidence. The reason why she decided to go OJ on her parents was because she thought they wanted her to break up with her boyfriend. Yeah... maybe they had good reason to if she decided to kill them for that, I'm just saying... it's a little crazy like that.
So that's all I care about today or even know actually... This is Margarita Sunshine and that's nice to know.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Haha... I don't know what post this is, but haha.
Today is haha day, and my birthday, yes that is correct, I do happen to remember my birthday. Is in about three or two weeks from now! I can't wait and I might be getting a boyfriend who isn't the people I've been talking about!
Yeah... I'm exciting because I can FINALLY move on to bigger (waaayyy bigger if you know what I mean) and better things.
I'm not perverted... anyways... if anyone asks, whom this person might be I'll bitch slap you because I DONT WANT YOU TO KNOW!
Okay so in recent news the Oscars... Grammys? Tonys? Whatever Oscars have come out... and the people who you wanted to win didn't blah blah blah and I don't care.
Okay so Prince of England decided to go over to Iraq with British troops, yeah apparently when more than two countries are involved that kinda makes it a world war if someone else decided to bomb britian. I mean hey there's plently of Muslims there...
Ooohkay, enough Racism here and there the primarys are still going on, blah, blah, blah stuff I don't care about... But apparently it's a certain Shay Carl's birthday this month, woo! Moving on... Sxephil or the Phillip man who isn't sexy went to the Youtube gathering where you could meet up with other nerds on Youtube like What the Buck and Smosh.
Seriously Smosh I would date.
Bucky? Nawww...
Anyways... besides the fact that superman has finally left the building, this guy named Ben something decided to make fun of Phil during the gathering. Asshole? Yes please Ben or no Ben? No whammy!
Anyways, besides posting this random post about actual news in my own special bitch slapping way, I have to bid you a good-bye and not take notes on anything because I don't have history homework and I'm not going to goof off the entire day away.
I'm Margarita and that's nice to know.
Yeah... I'm exciting because I can FINALLY move on to bigger (waaayyy bigger if you know what I mean) and better things.
I'm not perverted... anyways... if anyone asks, whom this person might be I'll bitch slap you because I DONT WANT YOU TO KNOW!
Okay so in recent news the Oscars... Grammys? Tonys? Whatever Oscars have come out... and the people who you wanted to win didn't blah blah blah and I don't care.
Okay so Prince of England decided to go over to Iraq with British troops, yeah apparently when more than two countries are involved that kinda makes it a world war if someone else decided to bomb britian. I mean hey there's plently of Muslims there...
Ooohkay, enough Racism here and there the primarys are still going on, blah, blah, blah stuff I don't care about... But apparently it's a certain Shay Carl's birthday this month, woo! Moving on... Sxephil or the Phillip man who isn't sexy went to the Youtube gathering where you could meet up with other nerds on Youtube like What the Buck and Smosh.
Seriously Smosh I would date.
Bucky? Nawww...
Anyways... besides the fact that superman has finally left the building, this guy named Ben something decided to make fun of Phil during the gathering. Asshole? Yes please Ben or no Ben? No whammy!
Anyways, besides posting this random post about actual news in my own special bitch slapping way, I have to bid you a good-bye and not take notes on anything because I don't have history homework and I'm not going to goof off the entire day away.
I'm Margarita and that's nice to know.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Nothing Like Tricking Your History Teacher
Okay so I'm at school, banging yet?
So freaking banging, mann, but I have to be quick, if I'm typing and pretending to look at the paper next to me maybe he'll think I'm actually doing something useful with my time. Now he's writing crap down so I think I'm gone for now. Okay I know I always say something about being honest with yourself - Wait... I never said that? Go ahead and lie all you want because seriously, if you don't you're pretty much screwed.
I only have limited time here, thankfully the macs haven't blocked this site yet, probably because it can't or hasn't detected it yet. So I'm actually supposed to be working on a project, but haha, you lose or win whatever... because the day is almost over AND you get an almost end of february post... tomorrow I'm either posting three or five things either that or a really long post.
About my day of course!
Hah, damnit only ten minutes left of class...
I gotta go print this thing, not this but something else I was looking at.
PEACE OUT BITCHES
So freaking banging, mann, but I have to be quick, if I'm typing and pretending to look at the paper next to me maybe he'll think I'm actually doing something useful with my time. Now he's writing crap down so I think I'm gone for now. Okay I know I always say something about being honest with yourself - Wait... I never said that? Go ahead and lie all you want because seriously, if you don't you're pretty much screwed.
I only have limited time here, thankfully the macs haven't blocked this site yet, probably because it can't or hasn't detected it yet. So I'm actually supposed to be working on a project, but haha, you lose or win whatever... because the day is almost over AND you get an almost end of february post... tomorrow I'm either posting three or five things either that or a really long post.
About my day of course!
Hah, damnit only ten minutes left of class...
I gotta go print this thing, not this but something else I was looking at.
PEACE OUT BITCHES
Sunday, February 24, 2008
My Little Sister's Essay
Okay so my little sister wrote this for a project and I thought it was pretty funny so I decided to post it. I'm not revealing my whereabouts, so I did of course change stuff.
MY Sister
Walls School 5 – T
Somewhere in NJ
My favorite day of the week is Thursday. Gym is on that day. When I grow up I want to be an athlete. I like to run and I like to play games in gym that has running. I usually win. I sometimes even beat the boys. I want to run in tract some day and race other schools.
Thursday is also the end of the week. I only have one more day till the weekend. I have fun on the weekends I usually have friends over. We made a fort in my back yard and I have my own kids army. I am Captain Melanie.
My friend Tara, is look out, with her official name as Queen Tay-Tay. Becka is the fort Inspector Blurh Blurh Blurh, and Brielle is the Co-Captain Bri. We protect the fort we built. The Fort X!!! We took an old big intertube, and took parts from a ripped up old beach ball. This is our Fort X weapon. If there is an intruder, we take the intertube and launch it up. Our intruders are the family pets, Sabel and Ginger and my older sister Bethany (That's me!). We didn’t actually get to test the weapon on Bethany yet, but we’re looking forward to that. When the dogs came, we tried to launch the weapon at their feet but the dogs were too fast and ran away. On Thursday, we would talk at school, about the Fort X and what we would do over the weekend in Fort X!!!
Every day at lunchtime at school there is a different lunch but Thursday, which is usually pizza day. I don’t have to throw out half of my school lunch that day. I will eat the whole lunch. Only one time we had a food fight during lunch. Some kid screamed “Food fight” and threw a cookie, but it was not on Thursday.
This is why I like Thursday. It is a particularly happy day.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
My Obsession
At first, he was just some one to fill the emptiness inside of me, it was true, it was never meant to grow into deeper feelings. But after a while, I began to forget that he was just someone I choose to like and not someone that I thought was cute or had a great personality. If fact, it was the complete opposite, at first I hated him and his personality but I was looking for someone to fill the empty void in my heart.
Then I became obsessed with him, why didn't anyone tell me about this? More importantly did anyone notice that my crush was more an obsession then anything else? How did I not notice this before, it took a damn book on the internet to figure this out! A fanfic no less! Strange enough the love story about loving someone not for their looks or outer views, but the love and person they can offer. My love, no, obsession was based purely on looks, not even, it was just a shallow void filling feeling. And you want to know the best part? I still felt empty, even with him held in my heart, I felt a piece of me was missing, because I gave him my heart. I practically handed it over unknowingly and he will never know the love I had for him, I cannot speak his name for fear of someone findind out and telling him.
And now it goes to my current dilema, I know he's still there somewhere, but I no longer look for him in rooms full of faces, I no longer hope he is at the mall or other places, no longer do I wish he was beside me in my bed, no longer do I dream of being his.
Not anymore, was it true that I let someone else fall through the crack though? How could I do that? Why did I do that to him? I love him, and I know I am speaking the truth, but it was conditional, I loved him like no other, like an obsession. I just came to that realization just now. True, there is a fine line between love and obsession, but did I happen to erase that line as the romance novel said? Did I just throw away all cautions to the wind and decided that because I choose him, I would love him no matter what? Like some pet or something? Why did I do that? Why did I promise myself I would never loose hope? Why would anyone ever let themselves do that? Who was stupid enough to love someone so faithfully?
And now I don't allow myself to think of anyone else this way because, I am not afraid, but frightened of the fact that I might actually fall in love with this one too. My heart clentches at this thought, I can't believe I let him fall.
How could I be so stupid? There was someone so great out there for me, and I choose him? Why did I do that? I didn't want him to be my one and only, I never thought of him like that, I just thought of the love I wanted and somehow he became that. And he's not even like that!
What did I do?! And now all I want to know is how long did I let this other guy fall through? How long did he yearn for me? Now I feel guilt.
Now I feel regret.
Then I became obsessed with him, why didn't anyone tell me about this? More importantly did anyone notice that my crush was more an obsession then anything else? How did I not notice this before, it took a damn book on the internet to figure this out! A fanfic no less! Strange enough the love story about loving someone not for their looks or outer views, but the love and person they can offer. My love, no, obsession was based purely on looks, not even, it was just a shallow void filling feeling. And you want to know the best part? I still felt empty, even with him held in my heart, I felt a piece of me was missing, because I gave him my heart. I practically handed it over unknowingly and he will never know the love I had for him, I cannot speak his name for fear of someone findind out and telling him.
And now it goes to my current dilema, I know he's still there somewhere, but I no longer look for him in rooms full of faces, I no longer hope he is at the mall or other places, no longer do I wish he was beside me in my bed, no longer do I dream of being his.
Not anymore, was it true that I let someone else fall through the crack though? How could I do that? Why did I do that to him? I love him, and I know I am speaking the truth, but it was conditional, I loved him like no other, like an obsession. I just came to that realization just now. True, there is a fine line between love and obsession, but did I happen to erase that line as the romance novel said? Did I just throw away all cautions to the wind and decided that because I choose him, I would love him no matter what? Like some pet or something? Why did I do that? Why did I promise myself I would never loose hope? Why would anyone ever let themselves do that? Who was stupid enough to love someone so faithfully?
And now I don't allow myself to think of anyone else this way because, I am not afraid, but frightened of the fact that I might actually fall in love with this one too. My heart clentches at this thought, I can't believe I let him fall.
How could I be so stupid? There was someone so great out there for me, and I choose him? Why did I do that? I didn't want him to be my one and only, I never thought of him like that, I just thought of the love I wanted and somehow he became that. And he's not even like that!
What did I do?! And now all I want to know is how long did I let this other guy fall through? How long did he yearn for me? Now I feel guilt.
Now I feel regret.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Bashing on Britney and Crazy Races
Ever notice how their hair never moves? I've never noticed this before but it doesn't move, like at all. They can swing their head around and still have Oprah hair. Have you noticed her hair? Never moves or flinches, and her, she's like always snappy and spunky. Did you know she bought her own show? Now if wanted it cancelled, it won't because she's the president of the black people and they're going to hire an assassian so Tyra Banks can be the new black president lady. Ever notice on the CW that almost every is Tyra Banks, they should just give it to her, hand it over CW so they can make it the new TBF, Tyra Banks Forever. What will happen when Oprah dies? Will OJ come out with another book about he swears he wasn't hired by Tyra Banks to kill Oprah? Seriously OJ, you so did it. Now what about the crazy white people? Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, kudos on chasing your ex assistant, it was almost as if you didn't want to die! Britney Spears that white bitch be crazier then turkey on rye. She had a horrible year. 2007 to be exact, it should just be renamed Britney screws up instead of '07. I can so see that right now. Instead of Match 19th 2007 it wouldbe March 19th Britney's on drugs. Seriously, does anyone think K-fed should have the kids? No? Okay. But what really shouldn't of happened was the fact that the kids should have just called Difus, didn't their nanny teach them when Britney threw them? Just wondering why Jamie decides to add in on the final, 'Oh yeah I'm trio months prego, suck it, Brit,' It's that awesome man, loving it every second when they kid is perfecto. We can only assume that busting on random people is fun. I'm here and that's nice to know.
A figment of your imagination, racism. Yeah, why do they jump at the chance to be insulted? I mean really why do they do it? They don't benifit at all, infact they all look like asshole in to their own race. And if you're that one person out there that's like, I'm OFFENDED, I'll hunt you down and smack the word asshole on your head. It's like you jump at the chance to be insulted, I said that twice, but it needed to be said twice! In all reality I could call you a ton of raical slurs. But I won't because that's not right and racism is just plan stupid. To me, it doesn't matter if your black or white, if you're twelve and already have a kid, I'm gonna say you're a whore and whatever race you are reflects on how people think of your race and sometimes your gender. Seriously you're the ones digging yourself into a deeper hole. And if you're like what do you mean by 'us' or 'they'. Seriously stop it, you're only making yourself seem more like an asshole. And we can't do anything about it. And if someone says something rude to me for no reason, I'm not gonna like them dispite their race.
So there, I'm done being rude to everyone. Have fun with semi-long/annoying blog posts.
A figment of your imagination, racism. Yeah, why do they jump at the chance to be insulted? I mean really why do they do it? They don't benifit at all, infact they all look like asshole in to their own race. And if you're that one person out there that's like, I'm OFFENDED, I'll hunt you down and smack the word asshole on your head. It's like you jump at the chance to be insulted, I said that twice, but it needed to be said twice! In all reality I could call you a ton of raical slurs. But I won't because that's not right and racism is just plan stupid. To me, it doesn't matter if your black or white, if you're twelve and already have a kid, I'm gonna say you're a whore and whatever race you are reflects on how people think of your race and sometimes your gender. Seriously you're the ones digging yourself into a deeper hole. And if you're like what do you mean by 'us' or 'they'. Seriously stop it, you're only making yourself seem more like an asshole. And we can't do anything about it. And if someone says something rude to me for no reason, I'm not gonna like them dispite their race.
So there, I'm done being rude to everyone. Have fun with semi-long/annoying blog posts.
The Really Long Appogoly followed by a really long post
I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOOOO SOOOOOO SOOOO SOO SO SORRY!
I've been swamped with crap and stuff and I'm also pretty lazy, this month is going by quickly (why is it so damn short?). Even though it has an extra day.
It's leap year and yes, it's that time of year to go off and vote for who you want on the ballot. Black people will most likely vote for Obama ignoring the fact that he is against America.
Hah, I'm so kidding! Like all those things against Bush, are really jokes to see how many people acutally believe it.
Hah. Everyone is a moron, everyone is stupid and everyone jumps at the chance to be insulted. It's true and they don't hide it either, they all leap in front to get the attention of others. Seriously, I think you all should just blow yourself.
Yes, go blow yourself. BLOW IT.
That's all I need to say.
I've been swamped with crap and stuff and I'm also pretty lazy, this month is going by quickly (why is it so damn short?). Even though it has an extra day.
It's leap year and yes, it's that time of year to go off and vote for who you want on the ballot. Black people will most likely vote for Obama ignoring the fact that he is against America.
Hah, I'm so kidding! Like all those things against Bush, are really jokes to see how many people acutally believe it.
Hah. Everyone is a moron, everyone is stupid and everyone jumps at the chance to be insulted. It's true and they don't hide it either, they all leap in front to get the attention of others. Seriously, I think you all should just blow yourself.
Yes, go blow yourself. BLOW IT.
That's all I need to say.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Ze Really Short Post in the History of Short Posts
And that was the really long blog posts in the history of really long blog posts.
Yeah so my Uncle passed away last Saturday and as you can guess, it was hetic and funeral arrangements and crap are like POOOOOP (My friend hates that word).
So apart from trying to make this post look longer then it really is, I'm sorry for not posting, I just went to the viewing (very creepy by the way, I never want one of those). And my aunt jokingly saying just put me in a trashbag and throw me in a hole.
Yeah, there is a law against that. But on the bright side, I can get a free plot for my dad in the Veterans cemetary because he served in the army.
Yeah, so I gotta go and this is the shortest post EVER!
Ze Byess.
Yeah so my Uncle passed away last Saturday and as you can guess, it was hetic and funeral arrangements and crap are like POOOOOP (My friend hates that word).
So apart from trying to make this post look longer then it really is, I'm sorry for not posting, I just went to the viewing (very creepy by the way, I never want one of those). And my aunt jokingly saying just put me in a trashbag and throw me in a hole.
Yeah, there is a law against that. But on the bright side, I can get a free plot for my dad in the Veterans cemetary because he served in the army.
Yeah, so I gotta go and this is the shortest post EVER!
Ze Byess.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
So Very Precious
Yeah, so I haven't been on in a few days... well, I just wanna tell you that something happened today which made me want to post. A man got hit by a car by my house, maybe a mile or so away and he died upon impact.
I started thinking, when my father told me, I cried, my dad was there when it happened, though he didn't exactly do it, he was still there. I thought my dad was going to jail because he had this grim look on his face, the police took him in as a witness and stuff like that. And then it wasn't until a few hours after I got the news was when I wondered if the guy had a family, if he had a pet, if he was allergic to cats. I don't know why I suddenly wanted to know all of these completely random things, but it effected me.
I wondered if he had a hamster or if he liked hamsters, I don't know why it was hamsters but still. And I've been depressed all day long because of what happened, and I even distracted myself into doing things like chores, I think I was really productive today. I didn't exactly cry, but I didn't exactly not cry, I still get kind of choked up when I think about it.
I mean, did he have a little girl? Or was he alone, but had a dog which was a poodle or something like that. I wanted and still want to know about this man because he hit me home, right in the heart and it takes a lot for me to suddenly feel bad and cry for someone else I didn't even care about before today. I mean, yesterday, I had no idea any of this was going to happen and then today everything changes, that man never got to work and his hat is still where he died. I guess I know why you have to go through all that crap to get your driver's license because if you didn't then you'd end up killing someone and you have to live with that for the rest of your life.
I mean how horrible would you feel if you killed someone? I mean it seems so blunt, but really how would your family members react to that? And would you even care if you killed someone and when it finally smacked you in the face, would you suddenly just break down? Or would you bottle it up until you were completely alone.
I wanted to post because, I wanted to say and tell you how precious life is, and you shouldn't abuse your rights as a citizen and you shouldn't abuse your rights as a human and you shouldn't do drugs because you'll die because you weren't paying attention.
Do you get it? Just be careful and abuse what was given to you.
I started thinking, when my father told me, I cried, my dad was there when it happened, though he didn't exactly do it, he was still there. I thought my dad was going to jail because he had this grim look on his face, the police took him in as a witness and stuff like that. And then it wasn't until a few hours after I got the news was when I wondered if the guy had a family, if he had a pet, if he was allergic to cats. I don't know why I suddenly wanted to know all of these completely random things, but it effected me.
I wondered if he had a hamster or if he liked hamsters, I don't know why it was hamsters but still. And I've been depressed all day long because of what happened, and I even distracted myself into doing things like chores, I think I was really productive today. I didn't exactly cry, but I didn't exactly not cry, I still get kind of choked up when I think about it.
I mean, did he have a little girl? Or was he alone, but had a dog which was a poodle or something like that. I wanted and still want to know about this man because he hit me home, right in the heart and it takes a lot for me to suddenly feel bad and cry for someone else I didn't even care about before today. I mean, yesterday, I had no idea any of this was going to happen and then today everything changes, that man never got to work and his hat is still where he died. I guess I know why you have to go through all that crap to get your driver's license because if you didn't then you'd end up killing someone and you have to live with that for the rest of your life.
I mean how horrible would you feel if you killed someone? I mean it seems so blunt, but really how would your family members react to that? And would you even care if you killed someone and when it finally smacked you in the face, would you suddenly just break down? Or would you bottle it up until you were completely alone.
I wanted to post because, I wanted to say and tell you how precious life is, and you shouldn't abuse your rights as a citizen and you shouldn't abuse your rights as a human and you shouldn't do drugs because you'll die because you weren't paying attention.
Do you get it? Just be careful and abuse what was given to you.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Think it Over
The Boy sees her everyday, but never says a word.
She looks at him, but he never seems to show he cares
He wants to know so much about her.
She needs to wake up from her nightmares
He needs to Think it all over
She thinks she needs to let him be
There's not much time.
You all know what happens next
He doesn't know what to do, his life is a mess.
She wants him to say I hate you.
He can't take it anymore, why does he stay?
She's so random, think it over.
He knows she's a beauty controlled by nature.
She doesn't know what he's still here.
He's thinking about her everyday
She's his only hope, but she doesn't know.
Do they really know why they're here?
In this hell of a school
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Ready for forever, love?
Do they even care about what they say?
Do they even care about their comments?
Do they even know they care about each other?
She rather have anxiety attacks then not see him.
He rather kill himself then never she her smile.
Is this Love?
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
This is Divine, this is Beautiful,
Why do his friends not approve of his feelings?
Why can't she understand she will never be with him?
Why can't he understand he will never be with her?
His friends are vicious, more the girls.
She hates them all, think it over.
He tries to tell them there's nothing you can do.
She wants to forget about him, she cares about him alot
He needs to make a move before it's too late.
Because my love you need to see
I'm thinking over the things you said
I'm thinking over the things you said
I'm thinking over the things you said
Leave me to die that's what they say.
Leave me alone
Leave her alone
Leave him alone
You can't stop this now.
Your the only one for me.
She looks at him, but he never seems to show he cares
He wants to know so much about her.
She needs to wake up from her nightmares
He needs to Think it all over
She thinks she needs to let him be
There's not much time.
You all know what happens next
He doesn't know what to do, his life is a mess.
She wants him to say I hate you.
He can't take it anymore, why does he stay?
She's so random, think it over.
He knows she's a beauty controlled by nature.
She doesn't know what he's still here.
He's thinking about her everyday
She's his only hope, but she doesn't know.
Do they really know why they're here?
In this hell of a school
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Ready for forever, love?
Do they even care about what they say?
Do they even care about their comments?
Do they even know they care about each other?
She rather have anxiety attacks then not see him.
He rather kill himself then never she her smile.
Is this Love?
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
Think it over, Think it over, Think it over
This is Divine, this is Beautiful,
Why do his friends not approve of his feelings?
Why can't she understand she will never be with him?
Why can't he understand he will never be with her?
His friends are vicious, more the girls.
She hates them all, think it over.
He tries to tell them there's nothing you can do.
She wants to forget about him, she cares about him alot
He needs to make a move before it's too late.
Because my love you need to see
I'm thinking over the things you said
I'm thinking over the things you said
I'm thinking over the things you said
Leave me to die that's what they say.
Leave me alone
Leave her alone
Leave him alone
You can't stop this now.
Your the only one for me.
Receipt
I, I know I wasn't perfect,
But you let me try, you gave me my life.
You made me who I am, today and forever.
And you, you are my longing day of love.
So on this reciept, I write your memorial.
Until you're gone, I'll never stop hoping.
You raised me, you helped me when
I couldn't fix my pain.
You gave me, my heart and gave me a brain.
Mom, you are the only thing that loved me dear.
And mom, you can't possibly know,
The way I feel about you every single day.
Mom, you were the solider I depended on.
And mom you gave me the strength, I couldn't even find.
Cause mom, you made me alive.
Dearest tears, I couldn't explain,
I don't know why, I didn't feel pain.
Maybe I didn't quite believe you were gone,
Or maybe I just didn't want to long.
I didn't want to leave you,
So on this reciept, I'm writing to you,
My thoughts about your life.
You always caught me when I fell.
You fixed my wounds on my heart.
Mom, you're the only thing I could've possibly held,
And now you're gone, Mom I need you now.
You're the strength I could possibly have,
And you're the only thing, I couldn't have.
You gave me everything I held, so tell me please...
Mom, can you help me?
I couldn't possibly cry on your shoulder.
Because mom tonight, you died.
I saw your body, I saw your very life flash before my eyes.
Because mom, You lead a wonderful life.
And now, you're gone because I didn't try.
But could you please, tell me,
Mom, you always cared.
And mom, you always tried not to cry,
But mom please, I need you.
Mom, could you please do this for me.
Mom, please don't stop loving me.
But you let me try, you gave me my life.
You made me who I am, today and forever.
And you, you are my longing day of love.
So on this reciept, I write your memorial.
Until you're gone, I'll never stop hoping.
You raised me, you helped me when
I couldn't fix my pain.
You gave me, my heart and gave me a brain.
Mom, you are the only thing that loved me dear.
And mom, you can't possibly know,
The way I feel about you every single day.
Mom, you were the solider I depended on.
And mom you gave me the strength, I couldn't even find.
Cause mom, you made me alive.
Dearest tears, I couldn't explain,
I don't know why, I didn't feel pain.
Maybe I didn't quite believe you were gone,
Or maybe I just didn't want to long.
I didn't want to leave you,
So on this reciept, I'm writing to you,
My thoughts about your life.
You always caught me when I fell.
You fixed my wounds on my heart.
Mom, you're the only thing I could've possibly held,
And now you're gone, Mom I need you now.
You're the strength I could possibly have,
And you're the only thing, I couldn't have.
You gave me everything I held, so tell me please...
Mom, can you help me?
I couldn't possibly cry on your shoulder.
Because mom tonight, you died.
I saw your body, I saw your very life flash before my eyes.
Because mom, You lead a wonderful life.
And now, you're gone because I didn't try.
But could you please, tell me,
Mom, you always cared.
And mom, you always tried not to cry,
But mom please, I need you.
Mom, could you please do this for me.
Mom, please don't stop loving me.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Kind of not really...
Okay so I decided to observe someone, or a few people all at the same time rather then in seperate weeks, I decided it would be interesting to observe them and then post what their behavior was/is/will be on this. So yes, blogging did win out of writing an Essay which is due... tomorrow or thrusday? Somewhere around there, but whatever, if I was really concentrated into it I could write it like this...
HAH, I'm sooo doing that. Sorry bloggers, I guess the Essay did win and considering another one is due a week later from tomorrow I'm pretty sure I'm not going to get much blogging in besides: 'Does anyone know the difference between diffusion and osmosis?' Eh... really if you know the difference, please don't e-mail me that crap, because I seriously wouldn't even have time to answer it anyways... sorry... well not sorry actually I don't care!
And that's why you love me because on here, first and foremost, it's my blog and second it's my duty to be rude and annoying at the same down... actually that's not hard... Today in the Media Center (yes I'm revealing something! SHOCK.) someone (rather annoyed by our tactics of disapproving the wall dropps, ceiling hangers, whatever the hell they are...) told us it would be nice to read if she could not have people talking. And my friend wittingly replied, I don't care... then I shushed her do to the fact that I have a little more manners? I suppose then she did and the same person said rudely 'thank you, I appreciate that,' Smartass... not really I would totally do that too, and it probably was for a class so I guess I can relate... (GASP! I'm relating too! Next thing you know I'll be talking about Global warming!)
Yes Global Warming... (sorry...) the subject which I deny to this day even though New Jersey still hasn't gotten snow (haha to flo flo right there...) that sticks yet. We did, however get snow and why can I type on here but not write a single thing on my essay?! It's like my body doesn't want me too! If there isn't any ink left in the damn printer I'm going to... there it is again, I'm remembering things I haven't before quickly... could it perhaps... that my life is going back on track? Nawww... besides the fact that I got an 87 (a solid B ladies and gentleman!) on my geometry test and the fact that I'm actually getting good at this stuff! I mean I'm actually making an effort to fill out paper in English myself too! Biology... well... biology... meh.
Sniff, sniff, I got that word wrong twice and then tried to type another in between the transition? Blah whatever I'm not changing it back you stupid OCD! Yeah, I spelled it right... but I didn't exactly spell most of these words right but that's besides the point!
Alright I'm actually on a roll (kinda) for the essay thing, so I'll post tomorrow, the next day... in school if I find a proxy (you can send THOSE to me =])... etc, etc.
Etc.
HAH, I'm sooo doing that. Sorry bloggers, I guess the Essay did win and considering another one is due a week later from tomorrow I'm pretty sure I'm not going to get much blogging in besides: 'Does anyone know the difference between diffusion and osmosis?' Eh... really if you know the difference, please don't e-mail me that crap, because I seriously wouldn't even have time to answer it anyways... sorry... well not sorry actually I don't care!
And that's why you love me because on here, first and foremost, it's my blog and second it's my duty to be rude and annoying at the same down... actually that's not hard... Today in the Media Center (yes I'm revealing something! SHOCK.) someone (rather annoyed by our tactics of disapproving the wall dropps, ceiling hangers, whatever the hell they are...) told us it would be nice to read if she could not have people talking. And my friend wittingly replied, I don't care... then I shushed her do to the fact that I have a little more manners? I suppose then she did and the same person said rudely 'thank you, I appreciate that,' Smartass... not really I would totally do that too, and it probably was for a class so I guess I can relate... (GASP! I'm relating too! Next thing you know I'll be talking about Global warming!)
Yes Global Warming... (sorry...) the subject which I deny to this day even though New Jersey still hasn't gotten snow (haha to flo flo right there...) that sticks yet. We did, however get snow and why can I type on here but not write a single thing on my essay?! It's like my body doesn't want me too! If there isn't any ink left in the damn printer I'm going to... there it is again, I'm remembering things I haven't before quickly... could it perhaps... that my life is going back on track? Nawww... besides the fact that I got an 87 (a solid B ladies and gentleman!) on my geometry test and the fact that I'm actually getting good at this stuff! I mean I'm actually making an effort to fill out paper in English myself too! Biology... well... biology... meh.
Sniff, sniff, I got that word wrong twice and then tried to type another in between the transition? Blah whatever I'm not changing it back you stupid OCD! Yeah, I spelled it right... but I didn't exactly spell most of these words right but that's besides the point!
Alright I'm actually on a roll (kinda) for the essay thing, so I'll post tomorrow, the next day... in school if I find a proxy (you can send THOSE to me =])... etc, etc.
Etc.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Addiction
Okay, so I don't wanna seem like a total hypocrite when I say this but, I did become addicted to a substance, luckily I actually went to someone and wasn't a retard and say 'I can stop when I want' and not accept any one's help. Now I did have a hand written blog post, but due to my dropping eyelids (yes dropping) I decided to tell you the general idea.
I was addicted to NyQuil, and still kinda am, right now I'm thinking about how my mouth wants to taste that really bad black licorice... taste.
It basically talks about how I'm in too deep in love with someone, I can't stop thinking about him, blah blah blah, I hate to be insensative to myself but, seriously I should drop it. And now that I'm saying it to myself, I actually feel lost.
I mean it's not like I don't like him anymore, I don't want to let him go, I guess I'm afraid he'll take me with him. But even so, it's not healthy for me to be addicted to someone and I hate to tell you this girls... guys don't think about girls 24/7 and it's not that special one either, they just don't. Maybe at night, they pray for your safety, but in general when they're with their friends, they don't think about girls or getting some, they think about video games, sports, and stuff like that.
But hey, I think about sports, video games, and boys, but yeah. When you fall for someone, try to be their friend first, guys don't like girls being addicted to them, I'm gonna start reading books that study the human mind and stuff like that soon. So I'll know how you feel.
Peace.
I was addicted to NyQuil, and still kinda am, right now I'm thinking about how my mouth wants to taste that really bad black licorice... taste.
It basically talks about how I'm in too deep in love with someone, I can't stop thinking about him, blah blah blah, I hate to be insensative to myself but, seriously I should drop it. And now that I'm saying it to myself, I actually feel lost.
I mean it's not like I don't like him anymore, I don't want to let him go, I guess I'm afraid he'll take me with him. But even so, it's not healthy for me to be addicted to someone and I hate to tell you this girls... guys don't think about girls 24/7 and it's not that special one either, they just don't. Maybe at night, they pray for your safety, but in general when they're with their friends, they don't think about girls or getting some, they think about video games, sports, and stuff like that.
But hey, I think about sports, video games, and boys, but yeah. When you fall for someone, try to be their friend first, guys don't like girls being addicted to them, I'm gonna start reading books that study the human mind and stuff like that soon. So I'll know how you feel.
Peace.
Wishing
It is time like these when I fear that I've made a mistake. I don't know what mistake it was or when I did it but I know I made a mistake. It seems so unfair at times, the things I do, why I do it. Half the time I don't even know what I'm talking about. I let my feelings get in the way of everything; they never ceased to banish me. I feel so alone, I'm so needy at times. I must having some type of attention or I'll explode. I have this need for someone, stronger then anything I've ever felt before; sure it may sound crazy but it's true. I'm torn between what I want and who I deserve. Why does everything I want seem to be already taken away from me? But then again, I don't really have it in the first place. A fling, that's what it was, just a short time and I could fall head over heels in love with someone and out of love at the same time. Most of the time it doesn't seem fair, but in reality, when has life ever been fair?
Fairness, was it really fair to do anything with him? I basically lead him on, I lead myself on too. I was in the world where if I wasn't loved, I couldn't be happy; but I was always loved. And it took me this long to figure it out. I am always loved, no matter what. I am still loved, even if I hurt myself purposely, I am still loved. I have been so blind in this world, fixed on having a certain image and state of mind I lost myself. Love yourself, I always tried but now I believe I love myself a little more. If I would have to marry, I would marry myself so I wouldn't have to go through all those difficult phases couples go through. I don't want to deal with that, and before I was talking about being alone and having no one to love, but I know I do somewhere.
Kidding, just kidding. Everyone yearns for that partner in life and may be someday you'll find them. Maybe I'll find mine soon. If I had one chance to save my life or to live forever, I would choose life because your companion can't life with you forever.
I've been given so many second chances in life that I don't deserve. And yet, I got it. My one chance, only one chance, how would I spend it? I don't ever think about the future, when I'm dead because I'd be afraid of myself. And that's the reality of things, given and taken, yes I said given. And take and fake and take. People are so greedy.
I'm glad I'm given.
This blog entry was hand-written three months ago and at those times, which actually are same right now, the conditions and the feelings that I felt are the same and I actually felt what I was feeling that day when I was scribbling down my chicken scratch on paper. Trust me, it's hard to figure out what I was originally writting that day since my hand-writting is horrible, I tried my best to write out (and make sure it made sense to you) what it said.
Fairness, was it really fair to do anything with him? I basically lead him on, I lead myself on too. I was in the world where if I wasn't loved, I couldn't be happy; but I was always loved. And it took me this long to figure it out. I am always loved, no matter what. I am still loved, even if I hurt myself purposely, I am still loved. I have been so blind in this world, fixed on having a certain image and state of mind I lost myself. Love yourself, I always tried but now I believe I love myself a little more. If I would have to marry, I would marry myself so I wouldn't have to go through all those difficult phases couples go through. I don't want to deal with that, and before I was talking about being alone and having no one to love, but I know I do somewhere.
Kidding, just kidding. Everyone yearns for that partner in life and may be someday you'll find them. Maybe I'll find mine soon. If I had one chance to save my life or to live forever, I would choose life because your companion can't life with you forever.
I've been given so many second chances in life that I don't deserve. And yet, I got it. My one chance, only one chance, how would I spend it? I don't ever think about the future, when I'm dead because I'd be afraid of myself. And that's the reality of things, given and taken, yes I said given. And take and fake and take. People are so greedy.
I'm glad I'm given.
This blog entry was hand-written three months ago and at those times, which actually are same right now, the conditions and the feelings that I felt are the same and I actually felt what I was feeling that day when I was scribbling down my chicken scratch on paper. Trust me, it's hard to figure out what I was originally writting that day since my hand-writting is horrible, I tried my best to write out (and make sure it made sense to you) what it said.
Monday, January 7, 2008
Bleehh
So this basically is a filler in the blog and stuff like that. I can't stop saying and stuff, it's like the best inside joke ever! I mean this weekend was sooo much fun because I went to the Philadelphia Art Museum - though strangely it had armor there... - and China Town to buy little Chinese ... things!
And today I got to stay home! And had sushi for lunch, it was really good sushi, even though sushi is Japanese, (my mommy says so) I still got to have Asian cuisine, which is good.
So I refuse to have a small random post so I decided to say that I'm really tired and my throat is sore for some odd reason I can't name right now, but I do have a clue as to when my throat was going to get sore and had tons of honey today it wasn't even funny. Honey, next to cranberries, it's nature's antibiotic... actually cranberries pretty much own honey no matter what... sorry little black bears in North Jersey...
Yes, there are bear in New Jersey for those of you who this that it's just one gigantic city filled with smog, trust me, I know what smog smells like... GROSS, go to Philly (I hope I don't get shot) and take a whiff, it's like pollution on a stick and death to all the little birdies who fly by. But strangely enough I didn't notice any birds perch themselves on George Washington's head in front of the Museum and for those of you who don't know. There is a China Town in Philly, and it was dim sum!
It's a Chinese tradition every Sunday there's like a buffet thing you pick... random, but yeah. And Brittany Spears so sucks as an actress.
Yeah... just putting that out there Chris, aww... I still WUB WOO. No, not like that... idiot.
And today I got to stay home! And had sushi for lunch, it was really good sushi, even though sushi is Japanese, (my mommy says so) I still got to have Asian cuisine, which is good.
So I refuse to have a small random post so I decided to say that I'm really tired and my throat is sore for some odd reason I can't name right now, but I do have a clue as to when my throat was going to get sore and had tons of honey today it wasn't even funny. Honey, next to cranberries, it's nature's antibiotic... actually cranberries pretty much own honey no matter what... sorry little black bears in North Jersey...
Yes, there are bear in New Jersey for those of you who this that it's just one gigantic city filled with smog, trust me, I know what smog smells like... GROSS, go to Philly (I hope I don't get shot) and take a whiff, it's like pollution on a stick and death to all the little birdies who fly by. But strangely enough I didn't notice any birds perch themselves on George Washington's head in front of the Museum and for those of you who don't know. There is a China Town in Philly, and it was dim sum!
It's a Chinese tradition every Sunday there's like a buffet thing you pick... random, but yeah. And Brittany Spears so sucks as an actress.
Yeah... just putting that out there Chris, aww... I still WUB WOO. No, not like that... idiot.
Let's start it off a week later.
Okay so I decided to start off the new year by being a hypocrite and showing you all the parody of the eleven layers of me. And depending on my mood there MAY be a video.
11 Layers of Me
LAYER ONE: Spell your name with animals:
No, because I'm sure there isn't an animal named Y-Elephant
LAYER TWO:
--Name: Can't tell you
--Birthday: why would I tell you?
--Location: NEVER!
--Eye Color- eh... brown
--Natural Hair Color: brown
-- Right or left handed: hmm... no.
LAYER THREE:
-- Shoes you wore today: Why would anyone care what shoes I wore today?
-- Your perfect pizza: LIMES.
-- Best holiday: Eh... I believe that all holidays have a sufficigence
-- Most missed memory: NADA
LAYER FOUR:
--How many pets do you have: eh...
--If you got to go anywhere in the world, where would you go?: GERMANY because I'm cool like that.
--Who would you go with? cousin
LAYER FIVE:
--Pepsi or Coke: Hah, my friend put Dr. Pepper because that's the only soda she likes... I think I drank some of her Dr. Pepper a few days ago...
--McDonald's or Burger King: Ew. They make me wanna go VEGAN
-- Adidas or Nike: eh.
-- Coffee or tea: tea =]
--Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla because chocolate is messy
LAYER SIX:Do you..
--Sing: Why?
--Get motion sickness: Eh.
--Think you're a health freak: HAH, this is really stupid.
--Get along with your parents: why does everyone take these, we all know we're gonna lie eventually.
--Play an instrument: These are starting to look like police questions
LAYER SEVEN:In the past month have you..
-- Gone to the mall: stupid question
-- Been on stage: stupid question
-- Gone skating: stupid question, everyone goes skating.
LAYER EIGHT:Have you ever..
-- Been in big trouble with your parents: stupid question
-- Ever lied about your age: eh who hasn't?
LAYER NINE:
--Age you hope to be married: eh
-- Number of Children: EEEEEEEH
LAYER TEN:
--Height of opposite sex: obviously women want them taller
--Best eye color: looks don't matter, cept the height
--Best hair color: Eh.
--Best age: MATURITY SCALE SAYS OLD
LAYER ELEVEN:
-- Number of people you could trust in your life right now: eh
-- Tattoos: ew.
--Piercings: ears, want one on my nose.
11 Layers of Me
LAYER ONE: Spell your name with animals:
No, because I'm sure there isn't an animal named Y-Elephant
LAYER TWO:
--Name: Can't tell you
--Birthday: why would I tell you?
--Location: NEVER!
--Eye Color- eh... brown
--Natural Hair Color: brown
-- Right or left handed: hmm... no.
LAYER THREE:
-- Shoes you wore today: Why would anyone care what shoes I wore today?
-- Your perfect pizza: LIMES.
-- Best holiday: Eh... I believe that all holidays have a sufficigence
-- Most missed memory: NADA
LAYER FOUR:
--How many pets do you have: eh...
--If you got to go anywhere in the world, where would you go?: GERMANY because I'm cool like that.
--Who would you go with? cousin
LAYER FIVE:
--Pepsi or Coke: Hah, my friend put Dr. Pepper because that's the only soda she likes... I think I drank some of her Dr. Pepper a few days ago...
--McDonald's or Burger King: Ew. They make me wanna go VEGAN
-- Adidas or Nike: eh.
-- Coffee or tea: tea =]
--Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla because chocolate is messy
LAYER SIX:Do you..
--Sing: Why?
--Get motion sickness: Eh.
--Think you're a health freak: HAH, this is really stupid.
--Get along with your parents: why does everyone take these, we all know we're gonna lie eventually.
--Play an instrument: These are starting to look like police questions
LAYER SEVEN:In the past month have you..
-- Gone to the mall: stupid question
-- Been on stage: stupid question
-- Gone skating: stupid question, everyone goes skating.
LAYER EIGHT:Have you ever..
-- Been in big trouble with your parents: stupid question
-- Ever lied about your age: eh who hasn't?
LAYER NINE:
--Age you hope to be married: eh
-- Number of Children: EEEEEEEH
LAYER TEN:
--Height of opposite sex: obviously women want them taller
--Best eye color: looks don't matter, cept the height
--Best hair color: Eh.
--Best age: MATURITY SCALE SAYS OLD
LAYER ELEVEN:
-- Number of people you could trust in your life right now: eh
-- Tattoos: ew.
--Piercings: ears, want one on my nose.
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